Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
