he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
