you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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