Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
