Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
