He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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