I'm lost and stupid without you.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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