What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
