I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Randomize
