I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize