redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
