i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
His nipple licking is glorious
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