I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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