Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
