Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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