And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
