Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
