Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize