it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
