ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
