I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Randomize