I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
false alarm, still single
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
