Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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