Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
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