our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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