You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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