dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
