Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
