i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize