Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
