Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
