physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
