The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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