Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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