6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
How external is "for external use only"?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
