im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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