this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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