At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize