Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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