Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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