Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
