I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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