It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize