North Korea, Best Korea!
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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