dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
