office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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