I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Are these your boobs on my camera?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
