shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
