I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
birth control should be required to get into college
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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