addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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