3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
